They were a long way off, tiny dots on the horizon. We could see them coming from a distance, but there was no sound. Their brightly colored ships had an eerie glow in the early dawn light. They weren’t very big, probably about the size of one of our tiny automobiles. Where did they come from? Another planet? They were too far away for us to tell if they had any occupants, but there seemed to be purpose in their maneuvering. They stopped often, as if to survey the surroundings. As they got closer we could see what seemed to be humanoid type creatures getting in and out each time they stopped. Probably gathering samples of some sort, we assumed. Oddly, we had no fear. They didn’t seem to be threatening in any way.

The vehicle stopped on our lawn just outside the window. The creatures took strange looking shiny tools out of their ship, each with something on the end that looked like a small power tool. As they started their experiments, we got a better look at the creatures. They moved in a very peculiar fashion, quite different from the way we humans move. They were bent over, and were unable to straighten their long legs. They looked at the ground, and had an odd sort of wiggling movement, with their posteriors sticking out and gliding side to side, somewhat suggestively. The sampling was about to begin; we could see them lift their tools, one at a time. High over their heads they swung, then threw the samples away into the far distance. Apparently getting just the right samples was harder than they expected, as they did this over and over. When one creature tired, another would take over and repeat the same movements.

We knew then that they had arrived. The Golf Ball Bonkers.